Varsity Blues Quotes
A collection of the best quotes from Varsity Blues by your favorite characters including Charlie Tweeder, Coach Bud Kilmer and Jonathon 'Mox' Moxon.
Charlie Tweeder: Jonathan Moxon your are under arrest for not being naked with some sophomore chick who wants to bathe you with her tongue, now take off your clothes and get in the car. • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Miss Davis: Can anyone tell me a common slang term for the male erection?
Student: Boner? Is boner one?
Miss Davis: Yes! Boner is good, boner is very good!
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Jonathon "Mox' Moxon: If we go out and half-ass it 'cause we're scared, then we'll always wonder if we were really good enough. But if we go out there and give it all we've got... that's heroic. You guys wanna be heroes?
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Jonathon "Mox' Moxon: The male erection. Pitchin' a tent, sportin' a wood, stiffie, flesh rocket, tall tommy, Mr. Morbis, the march is on, icycle has formed, Jack's magic beanstalk, rigor mortis has set in, Mr. Mushroom-head, mushroom on a stick, purple headed yogurt slinger... oh, and a pedro.
Miss Davis: ...a pedro?
Mox: yeah, uh huh.
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Charlie Tweeder: Will you listen to me? Bitches are all just panty droppers. You understand? That's it.
Mox: What?
Charlie Tweeder: Listen. You give 'em Percocet, two Vicoden and a couple of beers, and the panties drop. It's very nice.
Mox: [laughing] It's nice.
Charlie Tweeder: [emphatically] It's nice.
Mox: Tweeder, you think you'll enjoy prison?
Charlie Tweeder: [not paying attention] I don't know.
[looks up]
Charlie Tweeder: What?
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Charlie Tweeder: [Mooning Mox and Billy Bob through the truck window] Good moonin! Good moonin! I have been up since the crack of dawn and I had to *ass* you a question.
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Billy Bob: A 10... a 10... a f**king 10!
• Rating: 8.5 / 10 • Permalink
Charlie Tweeder: Hey you wanna see the new Tweeder end zone dance?
[Tweeder dances]
Charlie Tweeder: You know what it's called?
Mox: What?
Charlie Tweeder: The new Tweeder end zone dance.
• Rating: 8.0 / 10 • Permalink
Billy Bob: [staring at Miss Davis's breasts] Miss Davis, would you go to the prom with me?
• Rating: 4.0 / 10 • Permalink
Bud Kilmer: It makes me wonder if you know the different between a sneeze and a wet fart!
• Rating: 2.0 / 10 • Permalink
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Total Quotes: 17
