Nick Naylor: Don't forget, I'm his father. You're just the guy who f**ks his mom.• Rating: 9.2 / 10 • Permalink
Nick Naylor: I have a bachelor's in kicking ass and taking names.
• Rating: 9.0 / 10 • Permalink
Jeff Megall: Sony has a futuristic sci-fi movie they're looking to make.
Nick Naylor: Cigarettes in space?
Jeff Megall: It's the final frontier, Nick.
Nick Naylor: But wouldn't they blow up in an all oxygen environment?
Jeff Megall: Probably. But it's an easy fix. One line of dialogue. 'Thank God we invented the... you know, whatever device.'
• Rating: 8.8 / 10 • Permalink
Nick Naylor: The message Hollywood needs to send out is 'Smoking Is Cool!'
• Rating: 7.3 / 10 • Permalink
Jack: [In Elevator] Did you hear that?
Nick Naylor: [pause] No.
Jack: Exactly.
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Nick Naylor: Now what we need is a smoking role model. A real winner.
Jeff Megall: Indiana Jones meets Jerry Maguire.
Nick Naylor: Right, on two packs a day.
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Joey Naylor: Please don't ruin my childhood
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Heather Holloway: Heather Holloway.
Nick Naylor: Nick Naylor. Big Tobacco.
Heather Holloway: [holds up tape recorder] Is this kosher?
Nick Naylor: Only if I can call you Heather.
Heather Holloway: By all means. So, Mr. Naylor ...
Nick Naylor: [interrupting] Nick.
Heather Holloway: Nick. Let's start with ...
Nick Naylor: '82 Margaux.
Heather Holloway: Okay. Is it good?
Nick Naylor: "Good"? It'll make you believe in God.
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
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Total Quotes: 18
