Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back Quotes
A collection of the best quotes from Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back by your favorite characters including Jay, Randal Graves and Dante Hicks.
Jay: Yo lunchbox, hurry it up. • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Sissy: Y'know, I don't get you, Justice. You used to be into all this girl stuff. Stealing, boning, blowing s**t up, and now you're like this little priss with a conscience. It's really a f**king drag.
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Jay: I am the master of the C.L.I.T. Remember this f**king face. Whenever you see C.L.I.T., you'll see this f**king face. I make that s**t work. It does whatever the f**k I tell it to. No one rules the C.L.I.T like me. Not this little f**k.
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Jay: I AM THE C.L.I.T. COMMANDER! Remember that, commander of all C.L.I.T.s! When it comes down to business, this is what I do. I pinch it like this. OOH you little f**k. Then I rub my nose with it.
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Holden: If the buzz is any indicator, that movie's gonna make some huge bank.
Jay: What buzz?
Holden: The Internet buzz.
Jay: What the f**k is the Internet?
Holden: The Internet is a communication tool used the world over where people can come together to bitch about movies and share pornography with one another.
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Banky: Stop the movie? What are you, crazy?
Jay: All these assholes on the internet are calling us names because of this stupid f**king movie.
Banky: That's what the internet is for. Slandering others anonymously. Stopping the flick isn't gonna stop that.
Jay: This isn't fair. We came to Hollywood, I fell in love. F**kin', we got shot at, we stole a monkey, and I got punched in the motherf**king nuts by a guy named C**k-Knocker.
Banky: You know what? I feel for you boys, I really do, but Miramax - you know, Miramax Films - paid me a s**tload of money for Bluntman and Chronic. So it occurs to me that people badmouthing you on some website, is NONE OF MY FUCKING CONCERN.
Silent Bob: Oh, but I think it is... We had a deal with you, on the comics remember, for likeness rights, and as we're not only the artistic basis, but also obviously the character basis, for your intellectual property, Bluntman and Chronic. When said property was optioned by Miramax Films, you were legally obliged to secure our permission to transfer the concept to another medium. As you failed to do that, Banky, you are in breach of the original contract, ergo you find yourself in a very actionable position.
Jay: Yeah.
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Tricia Jones: Well! That was just another paean to male adolescence and it's refusal to grow up.
Alyssa Jones: Yeah, sis. But it was better than "Mallrats." At least Holden had the good sense to leave his name off of it.
Tricia Jones: Why didn't Miramax option his other comic instead. You know, the one about you and him and your "relationship" ?
Alyssa Jones: Oh, "Chasing Amy" ? That would never work as a movie.
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Jay: Do they say who's f**kin' playing us in the movie?
Holden: No, but it's Miramax. So I'm sure it'll be Ben Affleck and Matt Damon. They put those guys in a bunch of movies.
Jay: Who?
Holden: You know, those kids from Good Will Hunting?
Jay: You mean that f**kin' movie with Mork from Ork in it?
Holden: Yeah, I wasn't a big fan either... but Affleck was the bomb in "Phantoms."
Jay: Word, bitch, Phantoms like a mallf**ker.
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Ben Affleck: So? Action, Gus or what?
Gus Van Sant: Christ, Ben, I said I'm busy.
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Whillenholly: It may not be my way, but damn if there doesn't go one happy family. All right, gang, let's just shoot some tear gas into the diner, and then when the guys come out with the monkey, we'll... F**kbeans. That was them, wasn't it?
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Total Quotes: 51