Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle Quotes
A collection of the best quotes from Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle by your favorite characters including Kumar Patel, Harold Lee and Neil Patrick Harris.
Dr. Patel: I will not tolerate this business from you any longer. You have one more interview tomorrow morning, and if I hear from Dr. Wein that you are anything short of spectacular, I'll completely cut you off.Kumar: Dad, come on.
Dr. Patel: Daddy is not coming on anything!
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Harold: [about to ride cheetah] This is either a really smart move or by far the stupidest thing that we have ever tried.
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Kumar: How were Katie Holmes' tits?
Goldstein: You know the Holocaust?
Kumar: Yeah?
Goldstein: Picture the opposite of that!
Kumar: Nice!
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Kumar: [in surgery] Hang on a second, nurse. What we should probably use is marijuana. That'll sufficiently sedate the patient for surgery.
Male Nurse: Marijuana?... But why?
Kumar: We don't have time for questions. We need marijuana now, as much of it as possible! Like a big bag of it.
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Harold: Officer, I'm glad you're here. You ever heard of that show, Doogie Houser, MD?
Officer Palumbo: Yeah, what great show. Doogie.
Harold: Neil Patrick Harris just stole my car.
Officer Palumbo: Hey! NPH wouldn't do that, 'ight!
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Cindy Kim: Have you seen a Korean guy around here?
Hippie Student: Yeah, only when I open my eyes though.
• Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Harold: ...The universe tends to unfold as it should.
Kumar: What is that? Some fortune cookie?
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Kumar: Hey, are the cops still here?
[cops left moments earlier to check out a shooting in Millbrook Park]
Harold: What the hell are you doing?
Kumar: I just called and made up some story about a shooting in Millbrook Park.
Harold: Jesus Christ! What'd you do that for?
Kumar: I'm f**king starving! I figured I'd bust you out and we'd go get some burgers.
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Kumar: [sniffs] Hey, what's that smell?
Harold: What smell? Kumar...
Kumar: [starts sniffing like a crazed bloodhound, and then sees a huge bag of marijuana, his eyes widen]
Harold: Hey Kumar! Kumar! Where are you...
[Kumar rushes to the bag of marijuana]
Harold: Kumar! Still in jail, asshole! Come here!
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Officer Martone: [notices the jail door keys in the jail door, and Jackson sitting inside the cell reading a book] Hey, Jackson's trying to escape!
Tarik: What are you talking about? I'm just sitting here.
Officer Reilly: He's trying to break free! Get him!
Tarik: Aw, s**t.
[gets up and spread eagles on the cell wall, while still holding the book in one hand]
Officer Martone: Don't move. Stop resisting! We need back up now! He's got a gun!
Tarik: That's not a gun, that's a book.
Officer Reilly: Secure the book!
Officer Palumbo: Book is secure. You bring this filth
[book is on human rights]
Officer Palumbo: in here? What is this s**t?
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Total Quotes: 42