A collection of the best quotes from A Fish Called Wanda by your favorite characters including Otto, Wanda Gershwitz and Archie Leach.
Archie: You are the sexiest, most beautiful girl I have ever seen... in my entire life.Wanda: Get me my drink.
• Rating: 4.0 / 10 • Permalink
Otto: Don't call me stupid.
Wendy: Why on earth not?
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Otto: [puts a bag over Archie's head] Hello, Mr. Burglar! Going somewhere? Thought you could rob Mr. Leach, eh? Well, I'm going to teach you a lesson!
[kicks him in the stomach]
Otto: He just happens to be a very good friend of mine!
Archie: Otto! Otto! Otto!
Otto: [comes back with a long-handled pan] And he's going to be very pleased with me to find you here, all tied up and ready for the police!
[knocks Archie out with a pan]
Otto: And don't call me "Otto." To you, I am "Mr...”
[stops, lifts bag, sees it's Archie, screams]
Otto: Oh, my God... Oh... Oh my God. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
[pats Archie's face]
Otto: Please, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I didn't know it was you. How could I know it was you? I mean, how could you expect me to guess? Stupid jerk! I mean, what the f**k were you doing *robbing* your *own house?*
[kicks Archie in the stomach]
Otto: You asshole! You stupid, stiff, pompous, English...!
[screams and recoils]
Otto: I'm sorry! I'm sorry. Uh... uh... yeah.
[runs]
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Otto: We didn't lose Vietnam. It was a tie!
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Wanda: Let's make love.
Archie: Well, if you absolutely insist...
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Wanda: I want you to know something Otto.
Otto: What?
Wanda: Even if you were my brother I'd still want to f**k you.
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Airline Employee: Aisle or window, smoking or non?
Otto: What was the part in the middle?
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Wanda: The central message of Buddhism is not "every man for himself."
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Otto: I love watching your ass when you walk. Is that beautiful or what? Don't go near him, he's mine.
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Otto: You know your problem? You don't like winners.
Archie: Winners?
Otto: Yeah. Winners.
Archie: Winners, like North Vietnam?
Otto: Shut up. We didn't lose Vietnam. It was a tie.
Archie: [going into a cowboy-like drawl] I'm tellin' ya baby, they kicked your little ass there. Boy, they whooped yer hide REAL GOOD.
• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Total Quotes: 29
