Brandt: Mr. Lebowski is prepared to make a generous offer to you to act as courier, once we get instructions for the money.
The Dude: Why me, man?
Brandt: He believes the culprits might be the very people who, uh, soiled your rug, and you are in a unique position to confirm or disconfirm that suspicion.
The Dude: He thinks the carpet pissers did this?
 • Movie: The Big Lebowski • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

---

The Dude: Nobody calls me Lebowski. You got the wrong guy. I'm the Dude, man.
Treehorn Thug: Your name's Lebowski, Lebowski. Your wife is Bunny.
The Dude: My... my wi-, my wife, Bunny? Do you see a wedding ring on my finger? Does this place look like I'm f**king married? The toilet seat's up, man!
 • Movie: The Big Lebowski • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

---

Chauffeur: So he says "My wife's a pain in the ass. She's always busting my friggin' agates. My daughter's married to a real loser bastard. And I got a rash so bad on my ass, I can't even sit down. But you know me. I can't complain."
The Dude: F**kin' A, man. I got a rash, man.
 • Movie: The Big Lebowski • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

---

The Dude: Jesus, man, could you change the channel?
Cab Driver: F**k you man. If you don't like my f**kin' music get your own f**kin' cab!
The Dude: I had a rough...
Cab Driver: I pull over and kick your ass out!
The Dude: Come on, man. I had a rough night and I hate the f**kin' Eagles, man!
 • Movie: The Big Lebowski • Rating: 8.4 / 10 • Permalink

---

Walter Sobchak: You have got to buck up, man. You cannot drag this negative energy in to the tournament!
The Dude: F**k the tournament... F**k YOU, Walter!
Walter Sobchak: F**k the tournament? All right, I can see you don't want to be cheered up here, Dude. Come on Donny, let's go get us a lane.
 • Movie: The Big Lebowski • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

---

The Dude: I mean we totally f**ked it up man, we f**ked up this payoff, we got the kidnappers all mad at us, and Lebowski, ya know, he yelled at me a lot but he didn't do anything, huh?
Walter Sobchak: Well, sometimes, it's a cathartic...
The Dude: No, I'm saying, if he knows I'm a f**k-up, why does he leave me in charge of getting his wife back? Because he doesn't f**king want her back! He no longer digs her, it's all a show! Ok, so then why doesn't he give a s**t about his million bucks? I mean, he knows we never handed off the briefcase, but he never asked for it back. The million bucks was never in the briefcase! The asshole was hoping that they would kill her! You threw out a ringer for a ringer!
 • Movie: The Big Lebowski • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

---

The Dude: What's in the f**kin' carrier?
Walter Sobchak: Huh? Oh, that's Cynthia's dog. I think it's a Pomeranian. I can't leave him home alone or he eats the furniture. I'm watching him while Cynthia and Marty Ackerman are in Hawaii.
The Dude: You brought the f**kin' Pomeranian bowling?
Walter Sobchak: What do you mean brought it bowling, Dude? I didn't rent it shoes. I'm not buying it a f**king beer. He's not taking your f**king turn, Dude.
The Dude: Man, if my f**kin' ex-wife asked me to take care of her f**kin' dog while she and her boyfriend went to Honolulu I'd tell her to go f**k herself.
 • Movie: The Big Lebowski • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink

---

Jesus Quintana: You ready to be f**ked, man? I see you rolled your way into the semis. Dios mio, man. Liam and me, we're gonna f**k you up.
The Dude: Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your opinion, man.
Jesus Quintana: Let me tell you something, pendejo. You pull any of your crazy s**t with us, you flash a piece out on the lanes, I'll take it away from you, stick it up your ass and pull the f**king trigger 'til it goes "click."
The Dude: Jesus.
Jesus Quintana: You said it, man. Nobody f**ks with the Jesus.
Walter Sobchak: Eight-year-olds, Dude.
  • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink

---

The Dude: F**kin' Quintana... that creep can roll, man.
Walter Sobchak: Yeah, but he's a pervert, Dude.
The Dude: Yeah.
Walter Sobchak: No, he's a sex offender. With a record. He served 6 months in Chino for exposing himself to an eight year old.
The Dude: Oh!
Walter Sobchak: When he moved to Hollywood he had to go door to door to tell everyone he was a pederast.
Donny: What's a pederast, Walter?
Walter Sobchak: Shut the f**k up, Donny.
 • Movie: The Big Lebowski • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink

---

The Dude: And, you know, he's got emotional problems, man.
Walter Sobchak: You mean... beyond pacifism?
 • Movie: The Big Lebowski • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink

---