Bartleby: Ladies and gentlemen, you have been judged guilty of sinning against our almighty God, and I promise you, you shall pay for your trespasses... in blood!
[Rips shirt to reveal silver breastplate]
Bartleby: Wings, now.
Loki: I'm feeling a little exposed here ...
Bartleby: DO IT!
 • Movie: Dogma • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Loki: I forgot my little voodoo doll. Wow. It really does look just like you. Maybe, if I believed enough...
[pauses, then crushes voodoo doll of Whitland, who is terrified but unharmed]
Loki: I don't believe in voodoo. [leaves, re-enters with a gun] But I do believe in this.
 • Movie: Dogma • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Loki: Consequences schmonsequences.
 • Movie: Dogma • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Bartleby: You are responsible for raising an icon which draws worship from the Lord. You have broken the first commandment. Not only that, I'm afraid not a one of you passes for a decent human being. Your continued existence is a mockery of morality. Like you, Mr. Burton. Last year cheated on your wife of 17 years eight times. You even had sex with her best friend while you were supposed to be home watching the kids.
Loki: In the bed that you and your wife share, no less!
 • Movie: Dogma • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Loki: You're looking at eons of repression getting purged. If only they'd let us jerk off.
 • Movie: Dogma • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Loki: [to a female employee after he shot all of the board members] Gum? Oh, these guys, these men were evil. You're a pure soul. You have nothing to worry about... but you did not say "God bless you" when I sneezed.
Bartleby: LOKI!
Loki: You're getting off light!
 • Movie: Dogma • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Loki: Never let it be said that your anal-retentive attention to detail never yielded positive results.
Bartleby: You can't be anal-retentive if you don't have an anus.
Loki: Outstanding work.
 • Movie: Dogma • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Bartleby: You know, here's what I don't get about you. You know for a fact that there is a God. You have been in his presence. He's spoken to you personally, and yet I just heard you claim to be an atheist.
Loki: I just like to f**k with the clergy, man. I just love it. I just love to keep those guys on their toes.
 • Movie: Dogma • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Loki: Church laws are fallible because they're created by man.
 • Movie: Dogma • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Loki: The last four days on Earth. If I had a d**k, I'd go get laid. But we can do that next best thing.
Bartleby: What's that?
Loki: Let's kill people.
 • Movie: Dogma • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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