Kumar Patel Quotes
Dr. Patel: I will not tolerate this business from you any longer. You have one more interview tomorrow morning, and if I hear from Dr. Wein that you are anything short of spectacular, I'll completely cut you off.Kumar: Dad, come on.
Dr. Patel: Daddy is not coming on anything!
• Movie: Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0 • Permalink
Kumar: How were Katie Holmes' tits?
Goldstein: You know the Holocaust?
Kumar: Yeah?
Goldstein: Picture the opposite of that!
Kumar: Nice!
• Movie: Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0 • Permalink
Kumar: [in surgery] Hang on a second, nurse. What we should probably use is marijuana. That'll sufficiently sedate the patient for surgery.
Male Nurse: Marijuana?... But why?
Kumar: We don't have time for questions. We need marijuana now, as much of it as possible! Like a big bag of it.
• Movie: Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0 • Permalink
Harold: ...The universe tends to unfold as it should.
Kumar: What is that? Some fortune cookie?
• Movie: Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Kumar: Hey, are the cops still here?
[cops left moments earlier to check out a shooting in Millbrook Park]
Harold: What the hell are you doing?
Kumar: I just called and made up some story about a shooting in Millbrook Park.
Harold: Jesus Christ! What'd you do that for?
Kumar: I'm f**king starving! I figured I'd bust you out and we'd go get some burgers.
• Movie: Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Kumar: [sniffs] Hey, what's that smell?
Harold: What smell? Kumar...
Kumar: [starts sniffing like a crazed bloodhound, and then sees a huge bag of marijuana, his eyes widen]
Harold: Hey Kumar! Kumar! Where are you...
[Kumar rushes to the bag of marijuana]
Harold: Kumar! Still in jail, asshole! Come here!
• Movie: Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Harold: I want that.
Kumar: What? A Hot Dog Heaven super chili cheese dog?
Harold: No. I want that feeling. The feeling that comes over a man when he gets exactly what he desires. I need that feeling!
Kumar: Are you saying what I think you're saying?
Harold: We gotta go to White Castle.
Kumar: YES! YES! I knew you had it in you dude!
• Movie: Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Kumar: Do you know what the hell we had to go through after you took the car?
Neil Patrick Harris: Yeah, it was a d**k move on my part. That's why I'm paying for your meal.
Neil Patrick Harris: [looks down to count money] Here's 80 for the meal, and 200 for the car
Harold: What did you do to my car?
Neil Patrick Harris: I made some love stains in the back. You'll see...
• Movie: Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Kumar: [walks up to a bush and starts peeing] Ahh.
[Creepy Guy walks up out of nowhere and starts peeing right next to him]
Kumar: 'Scuse me, I just...
Creepy Guy: Huh?
Kumar: I have to ask you, why'd you... wha... wha... why are you peeing... right here?
Creepy Guy: What?
Kumar: I mean... why'd you pee right next to me when you could like, choose that bush, or...
Creepy Guy: Well, this bush looked like I should pee on it. Why are you peeing on it?
Kumar: Well, no one was here when I chose this bush.
Creepy Guy: Oh, so you get to pee on it and no one else does? Huh?
Kumar: No, it's just... I just...
Creepy Guy: This your bush? You have a special bond with this bush?
Kumar: No, I just thought that...
Creepy Guy: You the king of the forest?
Kumar: I'm sorry?
Creepy Guy: What?
Creepy Guy: You f**kin' tree-hugger. IS THIS YOUR SPECIAL BUSH?
Kumar: Never mind. Forget it, I really don't feel like gettin' stabbed tonight.
[they pee in silence for a bit]
Creepy Guy: [quietly] Nice pubes.
Kumar: [pauses, creeped out] Thanks.
• Movie: Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Harold: [yelling] How is that not the worse news?
Kumar: [calmly] The laptop situation really only affects you, whereas the White Castle situation affects us both equally.
• Movie: Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Total Quotes: 34
