Jerry Maguire: Jump in my nightmare, the water's warm!
 • Movie: Jerry Maguire • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Rod Tidwell: Who's your motherf**ker?
Jerry Maguire: You're my motherf**ker!
 • Movie: Jerry Maguire • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Ray: D'you know that the human head weighs 8 pounds?
Jerry Maguire: Did you know that Troy Aikman, in only six years, has passed for 16,303 yards?
Ray: D'you know that bees and dogs can smell fear?
Jerry Maguire: Did you know that the career record for hits is 4,256 by Pete Rose who is NOT in the Hall of Fame?
Ray: D'you know that my next door neighbor has three rabbits?
Jerry Maguire: I... I can't compete with that!
 • Movie: Jerry Maguire • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Jerry Maguire: How's your head?
Rod Tidwell: Bubblicious.
 • Movie: Jerry Maguire • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Jerry Maguire: Show me the money!
Rod Tidwell: Yeah! Louder!
Jerry Maguire: Show me the money!
Rod Tidwell: I need to feel you Jerry!
Jerry Maguire: Show me the money! Show me the money!
Rod Tidwell: I love black people.
Jerry Maguire: I love black people!
Rod Tidwell: Who's your motherf**ker, Jerry?
Jerry Maguire: You're my mother f**ker! Show me the money!
Rod Tidwell: Uh! Congratulations, you're still my agent.
 • Movie: Jerry Maguire • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Laurel: You f**k this up, I'll kill you!
Jerry Maguire: I'm glad we had this talk.
 • Movie: Jerry Maguire • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Jerry Maguire: I will not rest until I have you holding a Coke, wearing your own shoe, playing a Sega game *featuring you*, while singing your own song in a new commercial, *starring you*, broadcast during the Superbowl, in a game that you are winning, and I will not *sleep* until that happens. I'll give you fifteen minutes to call me back.
 • Movie: Jerry Maguire • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink

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Jerry Maguire: I'm still sort of moved by your "My word is stronger than oak" thing.
 • Movie: Jerry Maguire • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Jerry Maguire: What are you doing with me, Rod?
Rod Tidwell: Why?
Jerry Maguire: I'm finished, I'm f**ked. Twenty four hours ago, man, I was hot! Now... I'm a cautionary tale. You see this jacket I'm wearing, you like it? Because I don't really need it. Because I'm cloaked in failure! I lost the number one draft picked the night before the draft! Why? Let's recap: Because a hockey player's kid made me feel like a superficial jerk. I ate two slices of bad pizza, went to bed and grew a conscience!
Rod Tidwell: Well, boo-f-cking-hoo
Laurel
 • Movie: Jerry Maguire • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Jerry Maguire: I don't like black people? I am Mister black people.
 • Movie: Jerry Maguire • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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