Karate Guy in Porno: Oooh, excellent, grasshopper. And now for your final task of your training.
Danielle: You're gonna need a harder piece of wood that that, cowboy.
Matthew: That's not her.
Eli: Yeah, it is.
Matthew: Oh, no.
 • Movie: The Girl Next Door • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Eli: [realizing Matt has accidentally taken E] Oh, my God, this is gonna be amazing!
 • Movie: The Girl Next Door • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Film School Student: Why'd you skip film school? Don't you think you're a little young?
Eli: Shut the f**k up. Next question.
 • Movie: The Girl Next Door • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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Matthew: Do you have the fever?
Klitz: No. Why? Do you?
Matthew: I don't know. Maybe.
[turns to Eli]
Matthew: How 'bout you?
Eli: I just gotta f**k something.
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Matthew: Oh my god, she's so hot.
Eli: What channel, dude?
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Eli: I could make a better sex-ed film with my mom!
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Eli: God, I just wanna bang hot chicks!
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Matthew: What happened?
Klitz: It got bad.
Eli: BOLT! BOLT!
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Mrs. Kidman: Eli, do those girls go to your school?
Eli: Actually, no, Mrs. Kidman, they're porn stars.
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Eli: Okay, you know what the three of us are? We're a tripod.
Matt: A tripod?
Eli: Yes, a tripod. Which means that if you knock out one of our legs... WE. ALL. FALL!
 • Movie: The Girl Next Door • Rating: Unrated • Permalink

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