Al Czervik: [tees off] Fore![ball hits Judge Smails in the crotch]
Al Czervik: I should have yelled, "Two!"
• Movie: Caddyshack • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Judge Smails: I demand satisfaction.
Al Czervik: Yeah, well I'll tell you what's satisfying: *cash*. I'll shoot you 18 holes for ten thousand bucks.
Judge Smails: I could beat you with one good arm.
Al Czervik: Well, how about teams, then. I'll take Ty here, and you can have Dr. Frankenputz.
Dr. Beeper: I beg your pardon.
Ty Webb: Judge, Al, I don't play golf... for money... against people.
• Movie: Caddyshack • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Al Czervik: What're we, waiting for these guys? Hey Whitey, where's your hat?
Judge Smails: Do you mind, sir. I'm trying to tee off.
Al Czervik: I'll bet you a hundred bucks you slice it into the woods.
Judge Smails: Gambling is illegal at Bushwood sir, and I never slice.
[slices ball into woods]
Judge Smails: *Damn*.
Al Czervik: OK, you can owe me.
Judge Smails: I owe you nothing.
• Movie: Caddyshack • Rating: 7.3 / 10 • Permalink
Al Czervik: [farts] Hey, did somebody step on a duck?
• Movie: Caddyshack • Rating: 8.0 / 10 • Permalink
Al Czervik: He called me a baboon, he thinks I'm his wife.
• Movie: Caddyshack • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Al Czervik: While we're young.
• Movie: Caddyshack • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Ty Webb: Guys, don't include me in this.
Al Czervik: Come on, Ty, you're an ace. Everybody knows it.
Ty Webb: I don't play golf, for money, against people.
Al Czervik: What are you, religious or something?
Ty Webb: You might say that.
• Movie: Caddyshack • Rating: 4.0 / 10 • Permalink
Al Czervik: Hey, doll. Could you scare up another round for our table over here? And tell the cook this is low grade dog food. I've had better food at the ballgame, you know? This steak still has marks from where the jockey was hitting it.
• Movie: Caddyshack • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Al Czervik: [to his Asian companion] I hear this place is restricted, Wang, so don't tell 'em you're Jewish, okay?
• Movie: Caddyshack • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Al Czervik: You're a lot of woman, you know that? Yeah, wanna make 14 dollars the hard way?
• Movie: Caddyshack • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
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Total Quotes: 12